Nelson RCMP Officer

by Tony Holland from Nelson, BC
Jan 16, 16

When I was 20 years old I was inducted into the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. And I was sent to Thompson, Manitoba. A shock for a small town boy from southern B.C.  

Thompson had a reputation at the time it was considered a test for a new recruit. Rowdy parties were routine and could happen at any time of the day.  

One bitterly cold night we were called to the same party several times. 

As we entered the apartment block, for the last time, one of the senior officers told me to take the lead.  

My colleagues were huge guys from a bygone era and I…well…let’s just say that if you were fishing for mounties I’d be the one you would throw back in the lake.  

This was my big chance. 

After several loud knocks a semi-lucid person appeared at the door, pretending to wonder what we could possibly want. We stepped into the apartment and I surveyed the teens and twenty somethings and launched in to my official tirade. 

To my amazement things started to go quiet. The music turned off. The giggling kids on the sofa stopped laughing.  

One of the older guys looked at the room and said: "party's over!"  

I did it.  

I shut this thing down.  

My co-workers looked impressed.  

I felt a surge of pride.  

The older kid came over and stood beside me and said:

"Constable that was a wonderful speech".

And just as I was thinking “this can’t go any better”…the kid kept going:

"Yes officer that was a wonderful speech but.......your fly is undone".

I looked down and saw what appeared to be a giant white kite on the crotch of my blue duty pants. I was not just open, I was WIDE open.

I wish I could tell you I remember what happened next. I do remember laughter. Much of it from my brothers in law enforcement. 

I remember the long walk back to my police car, I remember more laughter, and little else.